He Is

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

(This is long.  Don't say I didn't warn you.)

Have you ever had a “God moment” driving down the highway? Well, I did this morning.

Yesterday, I got a text from a close friend with news that we were hoping wouldn’t come. The wife of someone I grew up with has cancer. Stage 4 breast cancer, to be exact. She’s a young, beautiful wife and mom. We’d been praying with everything that was in us that this diagnosis wouldn’t come.

As soon as I read the text, these lyrics played on my radio:

Father, let the world just fade away
Let me feel your presence in this place
Lord, I've never been so weary
How I need to know you're near me
Father, let the world just fade away

Till I'm on my knees
Till my heart can sing

He is
He was
He always will be
Even when it feels like there is no one holding me
Be still, my soul
He is

Father, let your Holy Spirit sing
Let it calm the storm inside of me
As I stand amazed
Lift my hands and say

He is
He was
He always will be
Even when it feels like there is no one holding me
Be still, my soul
Be still and know
Be still, my soul
He is

As I listened to this song, I couldn’t help but smile. Still deeply saddened by the diagnosis, I was ever-so-quickly reminded that God was not at all surprised by this. God had written every day of my friends life before she was ever born. I don’t believe that God causes people to have cancer, but in the midst of it all, HE (still) IS.

This morning, as I got in my car and headed to work, I just kept thinking, “This is going to be a good day,” which is an odd thought for me at 7:30 in the morning. Guess what song came on the radio first thing? You guessed it, “He Is.”

I just chuckled and thanked God for always reminding me that He has it all under control. I texted my friend to let her know how God was speaking to me. I knew she’d enjoy hearing how God was moving in this horrible situation.

When the song was over, I flipped the radio to the other Christian station and this is what I heard:

I'll praise You in this storm
And I will lift my hands
For You are who You are
No matter where I am
And every tear I've cried
You hold in Your hand
You never left my side
And though my heart is torn
I will praise You in this storm

God is still God, no matter what is going on in your life! I was seriously shocked. It was as if I was carrying on a conversation with God through the radio. It’s no secret that God speaks to me through music, but this was more than I could have imagined.

As that song ended, this is what I heard next:

When clouds veil sun
And disaster comes
Oh, my soul
Oh, my soul
When waters rise
And hope takes flight
Oh, my soul
Oh, my soul
Oh, my soul

Ever faithful
Ever true
You I know
You never let go
You never let go
You never let go
You never let go

When clouds brought rain
And disaster came
Oh, my soul
Oh, my soul
When waters rose
And hope had flown
Oh, my soul
Oh, my soul
Oh, my soul

Oh, my soul
Oh, what love, oh, what love
Oh, my soul
Fills with hope
Perfect love that never lets go

Oh, what love, oh, what love
Oh, what love, oh, what love
In joy and pain
In sun and rain
You’re the same
Oh, You never let go

By this point, tears were streaming down my face. I was completely overcome by just how much God loves me. All I did this morning was get up, get ready for work, hop in my car, and turn on the radio – just like I always do. But God had a plan. A plan to speak peace to my soul, and to make sure I heard what He had to say.

Now, please don’t misunderstand. In no way am I “ok” with this diagnosis that my friend’s wife received. That’s not it at all. In fact, yesterday after my friend and I had prayed together, begging God for a miracle (because we know He can do this – I’ve seen it first hand when my mom was healed from Lymphoma), I was disappointed to receive the text with no evidence of the miracle we’d asked for. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t. “Why God? What’s the purpose of cancer?? No good can come of this! Only tears and pain!”

But what God spoke to me this morning was a reminder that He is not bound by any diagnosis. He’s not sitting around, completely thrown off by what’s occurred in the last few days. He’s not wondering, “Oh no! What am I gonna do now?”

But I have to remember that God’s ways are higher than ours. Trying to understand and foresee what God has planned is futile. It’s really not for us to understand. That’s where faith comes in. Trusting in what we can’t see. Believing that God is faithful and that He truly cares about us.

Then, of course, this song came on:

Above all powers
Above all kings
Above all nature and all created things
Above all wisdom and all the ways of man
You were here before the world began

Above all kingdoms
Above all thrones
Above all wonders the world has ever known
Above all wealth and treasures of the earth
There's no way to measure what You're worth

Laid behind a stone
You lived to die
Rejected and alone
Like a rose trampled on the ground
You took the fall
And thought of me
Above all

And yet again, God spoke “I am in control.” Above everything on the earth - every medical condition, every relationship, every financial situation – God was here before it all took place, and He will be here long after it’s all run its course. He’s not surprised by any of it.

And as if this wasn’t enough, then I flipped the station again and caught the tail end of this:

…my song remains
God you reign
You hold my life
You know my heart and You call me by name
I live to say God You reign

By this time, I was getting quite amused. So after taking that in, I flipped the station to see what else God had to say. (And just FYI, I'm not the type to see God in tortillas.  Most of the time, even when I think God is speaking to me, I end up questioning whether or not it's really true.) This is what I heard:

…you are going to survive
Just above the horizon
A new light is shining, breaking through the darkest night
Love is coming and it’s calling out your name

Lift up your face, lift up your face
Salvation is calling, salvation is calling
Lift up your face, lift up your face
Salvation is calling, salvation is calling your name

Hope.  God is speaking hope.

My God is mighty to save and He certainly has the ability to heal a cancer-ridden body, does He not? But what I think God was speaking to me, through all of this, was that even if He doesn’t heal physically, He is more concerned with our spirit.

This morning, God was telling me to praise Him – no matter what. Keep seeking, keep praying, keep asking. When I do, I grow closer to Him.


Melissa said...

I love moments like that. It really helps you to be able to weather the storm. I'm sorry about your friend

Jenster said...

wow! i choose to listen to "the message" on satellite radio in the mornings on my way to work to keep me in perspective of how the day is supposed to go........

i am really sorry about your friend. i know the power of prayer and i know miracles can happen.

Lauren said...

I was totally blessed by this post. My friend is battling lymphoma cancer right now and she really needs to read this. I needed to hear this today!!! Thank you, friend!!!

Rachel said...

Aw this made me tear up. Such powerful words. I needed to hear this :) Thank you! God is good, all the time. I'll be praying for your friend!

partialemptynester said...

OMGoodness!!!!! I got chills just imagining your precious moment with God, thank you soo much for sharing! I tried reading this post three or four times yesterday, but with one interruption after another (I guess I should say, "after one dear sweet family member after another needed my undivided, willing, loving attention...", lol!)I gave up and waited for the quiet of the morning...and I'm, oh, so glad I did! I just love moments like that with God and I love hearing that others have them, too, makes those moments with Him so much more real for all of us! So, of course...I had to laugh and reread the "seeing God in tortillas" bit! Praying for your dear friend...and praising Him in the storm!

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I’m Stephanie - wife to one extremely handsome cop; mother to two extremely silly kids. The hubs and I have been married since February ’99. I love him more each day and simply can’t get enough of him. My daughter, Ashton, is 12 going on 17. She’s beautiful, creative, smart, and oh, so sassy. Taylor, our son, is 8 and is so much like his daddy it’s scary. He makes me laugh all the time with the silly things he says and does. He won’t remember what you told him 5 minutes from now, just like his daddy. I love to laugh and spend time with friends and family. I’ve also recently discovered a love for cooking and enjoy sharing recipes. I love finding new blog friends, so be sure to leave a comment so I can do the same!
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