Now I usually consider myself to be a calm, law abiding citizen. But I feel the need to warn you that Wal-Mart brings out the worst in me. Not necessarily the store itself, just the check-out process. To be more specific, the lack of check-out personnel they choose to hire.
So last night I really needed to go to the store since our refrigerator has been reduced to 2 eggs, what's left of a gallon of milk, and a couple slices of cheese. Yeah, there will be no "Mom of the Year" award on my mantle this year.
Anyway, since Wal-Mart is one stoplight closer than HEB, I continue to
I fill my basket with groceries. You know, the kind will win me the "Mom of the Year" award. Goldfish. Pop-tarts. Granola Bars.
I know, I really don't even have to finish this story because you all know how it goes. But what would be the fun in that?
Yes. There were a total of 5 check out lanes open. And how many people do you think there were waiting to pay for their Wal-Mart treasures? The entire Northwest side of San Antonio.
One thing I may have failed to mention before is that while I am a calm, law abiding citizen, I have been known to break ridiculous rules. So when I saw that the self check out line only had 2 people waiting, I chose to break the "20 Items or Less" rule.
I proceeded to use my children as child labor (um, that was obvious, right?) and had them unload the basket while I scanned faster than any Wal-Mart cashier could dream of scanning. So fast in fact that the bagging mechanism kept refusing to recognize that I had actually put my groceries into the bag and I had to keep pushing the "skip bagging" button.
Well let me just tell you that after you do that so many times the self check out register shuts down and the employee paid to stand there and watch those registers has to come over and unlock it.
Oh, and she also has to say "Um, ma'am, for future reference, these registers are for 20 items or less."
THIS, my friends, is when I thought I was going to kill someone, RIGHT in front of my sweet little children. I was certainly not afraid to tell this little chicky that I would not be forced to enter the land of self check out if Wal-Mart would dare to open more than 5 registers when half the city is trying to check out!!
"I'm sorry, ma'am, but this register is for 20 items or less."
Oh no she di'nt.
Yeah, she did.
So what did I do? The only thing I can that will keep me from doing 20 to life in Huntsville.
Ashton and Taylor were completely thrown off by this and asked, "Mommy, what's so funny? Why are you laughing? "
"Because baby, sometimes that's just all you can do."
Then I paid for my groceries, pushed my cart to the car and that's when I taught my children the most important phrase they will ever learn.
"Mommy, you told us NOT to let you go there!"